January 20, 2015

Stories & Style: Comedian Mad Libs

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Our Stories & Style event is coming up quick—have you RSVP'd yet? (Better get on that—the list is filling up!) We've told you all about the night's storytellers: Ophira Eisenberg, Elna Baker, and Sara Benincasa. While a bit of background information is always a good thing to have in tow when you're off to meet someone new, we wanted to give you a deeper look into the personalities and humor of these fine ladies, including our very own Nicole Lenzen. We gave them a throwback assignment of sorts, one that will look very familiar if you grew up with those handy-dandy packets called Mad Libs.

Sit back, read on, and get to know these four empowering ladies:

Ophira Eisenberg, Writer/Host of NPR's Ask Me Another

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I  can’t leave home without red lipstick.

My go-to clothing item is a sequin top. Unless it's dirty, then I wear a dirty sequin top.

When I feel most confident I look in the mirror and say, it's better than I thought.

My best beauty tip is to smile, but never ever fake laugh.

When I wanna dance I listen to Prince. When I need to cry I listen to Joni Mitchell.

Ray LaMontagne keeps me sane.

The strangest/best compliment I’ve ever gotten was, "I've masturbated to your voice on public radio. If you're looking for something less dirty: "I can tell by looking at you that you live in a fifth floor walk up. Keep it up."

My favorite thing to do for myself is cancel everything on my schedule.

Rachel Maddow is the most empowering woman I know.

Fedora, Beret, Beanie, or Top Hat?  In this order: Beret, Top Hat, Fedora, Beanie.

When I’m looking for a pick-me-up, strong espresso, little milk (or icy vodka) is just what I need.

Purse, Backpack, Fannypack, or Pockets? Purse, Pockets—If I never see another backpack or fannypack again, that would be great.

At parties I try to stand right next to the cheese cubes.

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Elna Baker, Writer/Comedian

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I can’t leave home without sending a messenger pigeon out first to alert the world of my coming.

My go-to clothing item is a tiny doll sock that I wear on my pointer finger to feel safe. Unless it's dirty, then I wear a condom.

When I feel most confident I look in the mirror and say, "I’d fuck me."

My best beauty tip is to suck your lips back into your face so they’re not visible. It’s mysterious and keeps people guessing. "Does she have lips? Why is she doing that?" But never ever let on the truth, at least not until your wedding night.

When I wanna dance I listen to The Cure. When I need to cry I listen to my creaking ovaries.

My skin bugs keep me sane.

The best compliment I’ve ever gotten was shortly after losing weight, “You look sick. Is everything okay?”

My favorite thing to do for myself is to walk over subway grates in stilettos while quoting Urkle from Family Matters.

Fran Lebowitz is the most empowering woman I know.

Fedora, Beret, Beanie, or Top Hat? Top Hat.

When I’m looking for a pick-me-up, crack cocaine is just what I need.

Purse, Backpack, Fannypack, or Pockets? Purse.

At parties I try to stand right next to the bouncy castle.

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Sara Benincasa, Comedian/Writer

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I  can’t leave home without my soul.

My go-to clothing item is a hollowed-out stag's head. Unless it's dirty, then I wear a fun and flirty bucket.

When I feel most confident, I look in the mirror and say, "Papa?"

My best beauty tip is to brush your face, but never ever comb your butt.

When I wanna dance I listen to my mother. When I need to cry I listen to my mother.

Gouda keeps me sane.

The strangest compliment I’ve ever gotten was, "Ma'am, you can't do that on a public street."

My favorite thing to do for myself is bathe in liquid cheese.

Lady Macbeth is the most empowering woman I know.

Fedora, Beret, Beanie, or Top Hat? Yarmulke.

When I’m looking for a pick-me-up, speed is just what I need.

Purse, Backpack, Fannypack, or Pockets? Personal assistant.

At parties I try to stand right next to the food trough.

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Nicole Lenzen, Designer

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I can’t leave home without my Brooks England full-grain leather backpack.

My coach Cortney is the most empowering woman I know.

When I’m looking for a pick-me-up,bike ride is just what I need.

My go-to clothing item is the Edie Romper from my collection. Unless it's dirty, then I wear a draped parachute silk dress I found at a consignment store.

When I feel most confident, I look in the mirror and say my affirmation of the moment.

My best beauty tip is to always wash your face before bed, but never ever use crappy facewash or soap.

When I wanna dance I listen to music that swings. When I need to cry I listen to Nina Simone.

Travel keeps me sane.

The best compliment I’ve ever gotten was that I look like a Greek goddess.

My favorite thing to do for myself is get enough sleep.

Fedora, Beret, Beanie, or Top Hat? Vintage fascinator.

Purse, Backpack, Fannypack, or Pockets? Backpack (see first answer).

At parties I try to stand right next to the most intelligent, yet least obnoxious, person.

Don't miss our Stories & Style event at Bene Rialto on January 29th, where you can try on designs from Nicole Lenzen; hear stories from Ophira, Sara, and Elna; win prizes; and enjoy free wine and appetizers. RSVP here.

Published by: Nicole Lenzen in Events, NYC Insider, People Who Inspire

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